Ditch Fear and Celebrate Failure

Deep inside we know what winning entails for us. However, few of us have the courage to do what we must to win. Instead, fear dominates how we view winning and it's almost as if we expect to lose and fail.

In this article, I will show you how to live with more purpose. I will also show you how to decide that you are more afraid of being stuck in mediocrity than doing what it takes to win, even if that means failing a few times at first.

The good news is that there is no winner out there who doesn't know what losing feels like. All winners have failed. But the difference between them and people who don't win is that they keep on trying until they win. They never tire of trying. In other words, they never quit.

So, we have a choice. We can either be a loser and regret that we didn't keep on trying when we failed, or keep trying, getting up every time we fail and keep trying until we actually win.

If you want to win and you want to learn how to silence that inner voice inside of you that tells you to quit, here are a few tips on how to do this.

1. Realize that sometimes failure is a requirement for finishing first and winning. Failure comes with the territory of winning. Failure is a mile marker on the pathway to finishing first. So, you have to expect it at first and keep trying.

2. Nobody expects you to get it perfect every time. So, please don't expect that of yourself either. To become great at anything, you have to practice, do you drills, and keep showing up and trying again. And you have to mess up and eventually get it right.

3. When you make a mistake, get up and start over. Never let a mistake stop you from trying again. You never know, the next time you may indeed win.

4. Make a decision that you won't give up, no matter what failure you fact on the way. Decide that you are going to try to win and you won't give up if you fail 1, 2, 3 or 10 times. This is because you are determined to succeed.

5. Learn from your failures so that you could make right on your mistakes. That is one sure way to eventually win. If you never learn from your mistakes and keep doing the same wrong things over and over again, you probably will get increasingly angry and you will lose your will to win.

So, by taking these steps and changing your negative mindset towards failure, you can eventually win. And when you win, you will feel that all of the effort is worth it.

So, are you done wasting your time and potential worrying about your setbacks and how they disqualify you from finishing first? If you are, you will discover that under the fear is the resilience and courage that you had to succeed all along.

Irene S. Roth writes for teens, tweens, and kids about self-empowerment. She is the author of over thirty-five books and over five hundred online articles. She also has four hundred and sixty published book reviews both online and in print. For more writing tips, please visit her website at https://irenesroth.wordpress.com/. In addition, she has several books published about self-esteem. Please double click on this link to read about one of them. https://www.amazon.com/Seasons-Empowerment-Adolescent-Girls-Irene/dp/161244122X?ie=UTF8&keywords=9781612441221&qid=1436902414&ref_=sr_1_1&sr=8-1

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What Purpose Does Fear Have?

I became interested in the nature of fear and its impact on human happiness while doing research for a fiction novel I recently published. In the story, there is a contagious disease called khaos. Those infected with khaos are prone to destructive emotions such as hate, anger, jealousy, and insecurity. Let's call these khaos emotions.

I discovered that fear is the underlying cause of khaos emotions. Not all fear; just unwarranted or misdirected fear. Let's call this illogical fear.

When is fear logical and when is it illogical? Imagine a predator is chasing you; it could be human or animal. You should be scared! That fear is logical. You need to think fast and consider your options for survival. Fear alerts you to a threat and provides you with increased levels of energy and motivation to help in coping with the threat.

Now imagine you're home safe in your bed and you're feeling uneasy about decisions you made or events that occurred. What is there to be afraid of? You might say, "It's just worry thoughts." That's illogical. Why worry about the past? If it's related to a problem, then direct your thoughts to a solution. If there is no solution, then worry won't help; and you must accept the things you cannot change.

Now imagine you're home safe in your bed and this time you're feeling anxiety about the future. Are you worried about something that may never happen? That's clearly illogical. Are you worried about an actual future event? You might say, "There's a real possibility something bad will happen." It's still illogical. Preparations and precautions are productive; worry is illogical fear.

Worry is only one khaos emotion. Let's look at others.

Fears of rejection or disapproval may trigger feelings of insecurity or low self-esteem. Common compensatory behaviours - such as criticising others, arrogance, or shyness - may push people away all the more. All of this is illogical.

What about envy and anger? When humans feel fear, they experience a fight-or-flight reaction. This is appropriate for life-threatening situations, like being chased by a predator. Most situations in life are not of the 'chased by' sort. Envy and anger are old 'fight' emotions which once served humans in the struggle for survival. Envy resulted from the fear of not having enough of something. Anger resulted from fear related to a threat. To feel envy or anger, when not necessary for survival, is khaos.

So if envy and anger are caused by a fight reaction, what's caused by a flight reaction? Other than the obvious - like running away - using drugs or alcohol 'to escape' is a flight reaction and khaos based. Substance abuse can't solve threats, life-threatening or otherwise.

Logical fear helps keep you from harm; not illogical fear. Without logical fear, humans as a species would never have evolved and survived. So why do we feel illogical fear? What causes the brain to confuse stimuli and trigger a fight-or-flight reaction when there's no real threat or danger? The answer lies in neuroscience.

Thoughts occur when brain neurons produce ('fire') signals and form connections. There's a tendency for neurons that 'fire together to wire together'. Meaning: connections between neurons are strengthened when stimulated repeatedly; and a strong connection between two neurons makes it more likely that if one of the neurons fires, it will stimulate the other to fire. As a result, the brain doesn't have to make a new decision with each stimulus; because with repeated experience, it forms associations. Consequently, repeating patterns occur and similar thoughts, feelings, and reactions are maintained. We can infer that if you practise fearful thoughts, you will have stronger neuron connections to support these emotions and they will become more natural to you. Therefore, to overcome illogical fear, you must train your brain to not react in a fight-or-flight manner when there is no real threat; and perhaps even more importantly, to not perceive a threat where there is none.

Illogical fear sabotages success. Think about it. You hope you can get promoted at work, and you fear you can't. If fear causes you to abandon hope, you are processing information in a distorted manner. Your fear is a perversion of reality. Your brain's repeating neural patterns of illogical fear want to keep firing together. Fear equals fight-or-flight. You unwittingly perceive obstacles and find diversions and you abandon your goal.

Now to address the question posed in the title of this article: What purpose does fear have? The answer: Logical fear helps you perceive and react to danger. Illogical fear serves no such purpose.

If you let your brain get into the habit of using illogical fear as a substitute for good sense and judgement, it will bring you discontent. Your thoughts will be of past disappointments and future anxieties. Mishaps will generate more fear. Your love of life and of adventure will be lost.

Eliminate illogical fear. You can accept your history, live in the present, and plan for the future. You can view mishaps as experiences that generate wisdom. You can be happy and adventurous.

Khaos emotions can be overcome if you don't give in to illogical fear. You have nothing to fear except illogical fear.

AUTHOR DENISE LAMMI, BMA, CPA, CA, is an acclaimed lecturer and an enthusiastic seminar presenter. A seasoned Chartered Professional Accountant, she is a respected author of numerous business courses used across Canada. Her personal development articles have been quoted and shared internationally. Denise applied her professional training in insightful and precise thinking in a new direction to write her first novel for young adults, LUCID WORLD. The book was inspired by her interests in history, science fiction, new age thought, and her own life experiences.

For more information on LUCID WORLD visit the website: https://www.lucidworldnovel.com/

LUCID WORLD is available on Amazon. https://www.amazon.com/Lucid-World-Denise-Lammi/dp/177508082X/

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Start Creating A Life Plan With Passion Concepts For A Life Of Purpose And Success

Take enthusiastic action towards living your life by design. Without it, passion and purpose and the enthusiasm to persevere are void.

Dedicate to yourself:

Yes, be dedicated and as well to those you love to produce strongly a life you can love.

Instead of responding, devote to producing from your heart and soul, out of love rather than fear.

Embrace and recognize:

Grab on to the idea that each instant is best regardless of its outcome. If you are not pleased with the result, choose to use that instant and one that is holy to discover and make the suitable shift.

Dwell entirely in an area of your mind on appreciation:

Slipping into a scarcity mindset and lack will become less of a practice when you consistently shift to appreciation, far from poverty consciousness.

While appreciating and extending your ideas use a passion and purpose formula of, 'Recognize/Reevaluate/Restore' in place of the, 'Shoulda/ Woulda/ Coulda,' whirlwind.

The former is based in increased knowledge and abundance while the latter concentrates on scarcity and absence. You would rather be highly passionate as you plan your life!

Be loose and ready and always willing to persevere:

Previously I discussed free material online like e-books and videos to help you along with mind relaxation and mindfulness techniques for building your life by design.

When you loosen up, you may discover yourself quite entertaining! Humor is very attractive, very enthusiastic: life-giving.

Trust that you are on the right track at the right time to plan your life and learn whatever lessons you are implied to be discovering.

Become a part of a neighborhood of individuals where you can express from the heart and embrace each other's dreams and life philosophy.

When emotions develop understand why:

Take time out to be completely in that instant and this will set a standard for children and your coworkers exactly what it means to be authentically engaged in life, no matter what is dispensed.

The inner peace and freedom-- a liberty of true free will, we may say, for you AND those whose lives you touch will astonish you.

Be strongly vulnerable in connecting with people core to core instead of ostensibly. Practice interdependency for the strength of synergy rather than the weakness of self-indulgence.

Think that you are the architect of your fate:

A Course in Miracles teaches that, "Child of peace, the light has come to you. The light you bring you do not recognize, and yet you will remember."

Nobody can answer what's life about, for you, and take your passionate future from you other than for you!

Begin creating a life plan authentically while visualizing everything working together and into location with ideal, enthusiastic accuracy.

Take enthusiastic action to plan your life by design and devote to yourself to produce powerfully a life you can love.

Become a part of a helpful community of other mind training and mind relaxation seekers and experts, where you can help each other answer, 'what to do with my life.'

Always reveal from the heart and welcome each other's dreams and life approach, so the freedom for you AND those whose lives you touch will impress you.

(Please note I suggest searching the web for helpful content whether you are thinking wrong-mindedly or right-mindedly for how to plan your life.)

To a life of passion and success!

You can find related info on topics like, 'helping you define the meaning of success for yourself so you may take steps toward creating the life you want.', and so much more: http://jamesnussbaumer.com/meaning-of-success/

The link above gives you access to further helpful material and for folks who are interested in letting go of the past and moving on in life to attaining Real Abundance, Purpose, and Wellness in their lives.

Hi, I'm James Nussbaumer, I'd like to introduce myself through my thought provoking self-improvement and inspirational books, articles, videos, Podcast, and other content for a better life, where I reflect on the principles of A Course in Miracles. It's about being all you can be and a life of success and happiness. Thank you for visiting.

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STOP NEGATIVE SELF TALK - Listen To This Everyday

Life Is Too Short To Care About What Other People Say

We cannot please everyone. So, why do we care? Let's live life to the fullest and have fun. At lease we give them something to talk about.

Reality check: It's not possible to meet up to everyone's expectations. There will always be people who will judge us no matter what we say or do, or how we treat them. It's inherent to human nature. In fact, we often worry what others think about us but it won't help us move on with life. It will just upset us and hinder our vision to see things in a clearer perspective.

Sometimes, we tend to settle on the status quo. We have a tendency to flip life just because of the things we do to please others, not as a result of what we believe. Eventually our actions become wrought by how we expect others to understand us. We cannot stop people from judging us but we can do something to lessen its impact on us.

Think about the worst factor that might presumably happen once somebody is judging you of what you are doing. I guarantee that nothing can happen. We may react for that matter but nobody really cares.

Start standing up for what you think in-causes, opinions, anything. you are going to possess those that ail you anyways, therefore why not specific however you really feel? I've learned that it's better to be cherished by a couple of folks you care regarding, than to be liked by everybody. These are family, friends, who love you for who you are, and also the folks that are going to be there for you throughout your worst times.

Worrying an excessive amount of concerning what others suppose will become a self-fulfilling prophecy, as a result of the means we predict starts to become the means we tend to behave. These people become people-pleasers and excessively accommodating to others, thinking it'll stop them from being judged. In fact, the public don't love push-overs and are turned off by it. The behavior we tend to use in an endeavor to please others will truly cause the opposing result. This implies that if you are a push-over, then you are going to be attracting others in your life WHO are also push-overs.

We tend to begin thinking that this is often the norm and that we stay comfy which is often not an area you wish to be. First and foremost, you wish to understand what is vital to you in life, what you actually worth, and what you are ultimately aiming for. Once you recognize who you actually are and what matters to you, what others think about you becomes nothing.

Stop saying YES to everything. Instead, learn to say NO and straighten your values.

Surround yourself with those who are self-assured and live life without comprising their core values.

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How To Stay Happy When You At Work

Are you happy to go to work? Do you see your work as fun or a burden? How do you feel when you are about to go to work? Are you searching for tips to help you to be happy to go to work? Do not stress out; at the end of this article, you will be well-informed about how to be happy to go to work and stay happy when working.
First, you should realize that your state of mind has a direct impact on your attitude at work. And your work has a lot of influence on your mood. Given that, it is crucial that you find the right job or work that makes you happy. However, if you are not satisfied with your existing work, you need to find ways to be happy so that you will not feel burdened.

#1. See The Bigger Picture - The Work Is a Means to an End
You should have personal goals to achieve in your chosen career. To be seen as an experienced professional or worker in your chosen field, you must satisfy certain conditions such as years of experience and overall attitude to work.
Your work is undoubtedly one major way to climb specific ladders in your career. Consequently, you need to see your work as a means to achieve your career goals, and every passing day, you are getting closer to becoming an authority in your career.

#2. Change Your Attitude - Feel Fulfilled
Nothing can be more effective than changing your attitude about your work. While other people, including you, view your work as being overly tasking and boring, see your work as exciting and fun. Picture the complicated processes in your work as a puzzle game and gift yourself a trophy or prize when you finish each day's work completing your duty - like a cup of cappuccino.

#3. Embrace Co-workers - You Are Not Competitors But Partners
Irrespective of the attitude of your co-workers, you need to embrace them to be happy at work. You are meant to complement one another and achieve the organizational goals together. And you need them to meet your targets and deliver expected goals. You are partners; find a reason to like each one of your colleagues.

#4. Find a Reason to be Proud of Your Work
If you are not proud of your company, you certainly will not be happy to go to work. Instead, jot down what you do like about your company and find what your company stands for in your field. Be a part of something that your company does that makes you happy, then you will always be happy to go to work.

Innovator, Trendsetter, Author and entrepreneur... These are few words to describe Carl Mathis. While some may know him as a minister and a teacher, others have become fond of him through his written work, "Think Like A Winner." For speaking engagements or to find out more about Carl Mathis, visit http://www.carlmathisbooks.com or email carlmathis4u@gmail.com

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Louise Hay: You are what you think

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To Preschool or Not to Preschool?

If you have a little one, chances are you have been asked if he or she will attend a preschool. Some parents feel that the time before Kindergarten is a wonderful opportunity to learn basic skills before school, and others feel that kids are just too young and will be better taught at home with mom and dad.

As each family is different, finding the right fit for you has to be a personal choice, but there are quite a few things about preschool and what it gives your child that you may be interested in hearing.

Children of preschool age are little sponges; they take everything in and are constantly asking questions about anything and everything. In a preschool environment, they are given a chance to ask those questions, to let their imaginations loose through play based learning opportunities and to learn social skills along the way as to how to share, how to collaborate and how to take turns.

Furthermore, a preschool class will be set up similarly to a kindergarten class so kids get a feel for 'school' before they're actually at one. They will be exposed to letters, numbers and shapes, gain better pre-reading skills and enjoy richer vocabularies. They will also get a head start in math, acquiring stronger base math skills that they can use as a foundation for their learning.

In a social situation, they also learn how to raise their hand when they want to share, are encouraged to share and take part in activities like circle time and learn how to listen to others and ask questions of them when needed. These good social skills are always important to master and the earlier the better, so the experts say.

Little ones also gain a sense of independence, they are allowed to try new things and realize they can do things all on their own. They learn how to problem solve, and grow a strong behaviour management system all at the same time. They learn how to be respectful both of others and their belongings, and they learn how to get along with others, all in a loving and comfortable environment.

A preschool differs somewhat from a child care facility or a babysitter because they strive to get your child that head start for school, all while taking care of your little one should you need child care like many families do.

Serving the Rocklin CA area, Knowledge Tree Children's Academy caters to kids 0-12 years of age. They excel in child development and early childhood education, teaching kids about diverse cultures, developing second languages and giving them a chance to grow and learn in a positive environment. To find out more about the programs or to book a tour, please visit http://www.knowledgetreekids.com

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Why I Dropped Out of College | Steve Jobs

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How Jennifer Lopez Went From Homeless To Most Powerful Celebrity - Best Motivational Success Story

Happiness May Save Your Life

1. Happiness is a habit.

There has been so much reporting of tragedy, hurt, pain, and suffering recently that I have found myself joining in the familiar mantra of gloom misery and despair that friends, colleagues all repeat on a regular basis. It now almost feels obscene to express joy or happiness anymore.

There is no question that very many people are being impacted and affected daily by a variety of pain, sorrow and loss, and compassion must be shown to them. However, there are also many other people who have made complaints and unhappiness the order of the day.

The truth of the matter is that happiness is a state of the mind. You have the freedom to choose happiness; it's as simple as that. The great things of life are usually simple, dynamic and creative.

Begin now to choose happiness. This takes being mindful of a desire to be happy. Reverse the mantra of blame, accusations, condemnations and judgements. Avoid thoughts that are repeated regularly and that systematically sink into the subconscious mind and become habitual. Happiness is a habit.

2. The desire to be happy.

In order to be happy, you must sincerely desire to be happy. There was a time when almost every day when I woke up, I had a kick in my step and a smile on my face. As time progressed, I found that this state was becoming less instinctive and I literarily had to drag my thoughts and demeanour away from what I didn't want to one of joy and happiness.

This is not to say I was or am in denial of whatever challenges of my environment there might be to overcome. I'm simply making a choice in spite of that, to be happy.

There are people who have been depressed, dejected and unhappy for so long that even when something joyful or good happens to them, they have become accustomed to the old mental patterns of unhappiness that they do not feel comfortable being happy. They long for the former depressed unhappy state.

Sometimes people become addicted to the attention (albeit negative) from being miserable and unhappy. There is an expression that 'misery loves company', and there is a pull to bring others into this unholy alliance. There seems to be a peculiar mental, morbid streak in many people, whereby they seem to enjoy being miserable sad and unhappy.

Many people choose unhappiness by entertaining bleak thoughts such as: 'everything is going to go wrong', 'I'm not going to succeed', everyone is against me', 'business is bad and going to get worse', and I never get any breaks'. Having this attitude of mind first thing in the morning will undoubtedly leave you feeling unhappy. Worse still, it leaves you unavailable and unprepared for the opportunities that may come your way that day.

Begin to realize the world you live in is determined largely by what goes on in your mind. The thoughts you habitually entertain in your mind have the tendency to actualize themselves in physical conditions. I am always amazed at how creative and productive I become when I take control of my thoughts and not allow them to run rampant and reckless; during which time I lose the ability to think intelligently.

3. Wealth in and of itself does not make a person happy.

Wealth in and of itself does not make a person happy, though it is also not a deterrent to happiness. Today, there are many people trying to buy happiness through material acquisitions. The key to happiness is in your thoughts and feelings. Too many people have the idea that it takes something artificial to produce happiness, whereas happiness is a mental and spiritual state.

Few of us will get through life without experiencing some episode of anxiety, anger, worry or depression. However, we can all learn to handle difficult emotions, the key is training our minds in compassion. Compassion towards ourselves and other people can help us heal our turbulent minds and enhance your well-being. Compassionate thinking is a skill, much like learning to play an instrument, something that can be enhanced with dedicated practice.

The practice of regulating thoughts and emotions can be useful for those prone to anxiety or depression and learning compassion for other people can help with gaining perspective. When we find compassion for others, in so doing we strengthen our characters and enhance our well-being. Nigeria is a country screaming for compassion for and by its people.

Recognizing that we are all mortal and imperfect and that is part of what we share as a human experience is an important part of compassion. Having compassion for others and ultimately ourselves means we honour and accept our humanness. Things will not always go our way. We will encounter frustrations and loss. We will make mistakes, fall short of our ideals, face big or small challenges and encounter personal failings. Having compassion allows us to be less judgmental of others as well as ourselves.

4. Happiness is the harvest of a quiet mind.

We need to anchor our thoughts on peace, prose, security, and possibly divine guidance. Negative thoughts and emotions sink to our subconscious and cause all kinds of difficulties and maladies in our life. When your attention wanders bring it back to the contemplation of your goals and the good in you. Make a habit of this and subsequently, you discipline your mind. This can be life-affirming.

Learning to adjust our thinking to be more compassionate involves a small but regular commitment to retraining our emotional distress enable us to handle and recover from our stress better. If people can activate their self-soothing system, through generating thoughts and images of kindness, they might be more likely to manage difficult feelings and will be less likely to engage in an unhelpful and destructive behaviour.

You have the freedom to choose a good or bad habit. To form a new habit, you must be convinced that it is desirable. Happiness is desirable!

5. Interpersonal relationship engineer happiness in one's life.

Interpersonal relationships are important and necessary for our continuous existence. Without them, our lives would have virtually no meaning or purpose. An interpersonal relationship provides companionship. No matter how self-reliant you are, you can't be alone or live in isolation.

As humans, we cannot avoid interactions with one another. Relationship with other humans is the most fundamental aspect of our lives because we are innately social, and are shaped by our experiences with others. Whether in the home, at work or any other place, we have acquaintances with people-casual or close-and maintain relationship everywhere we go.

A close association or acquaintance between one or two people that may be brief or enduring is called interpersonal relationship. The association may be based on love, solidarity, regular business interactions, or some other type of social commitment. Interpersonal relationships are formed in different contexts that can vary from marriage, family or kinship relations, friendship, relations with associates, work, neighbourhoods, and places of worship. These contexts account for the different types of interpersonal relationship: marriage, family, friendship, professional etc.

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How The "Loser" Who Earned $12 a Month Became a Billionaire - Motivational Success Story Of Jack Ma

7 Secrets to Improve Self-Esteem

Low self-esteem is not a problem only faced by teenagers and youngsters.

There are many adults today - even in their golden years - who don't have good self-esteem.

This is sad because low self-esteem can make our relationships suffer, we are constantly envying other people and make us feel... pretty much lousy about ourselves.

It's time to change that!

Good Self-Esteem Will Make You Feel Great About Yourself

I'm sure you know a person or 2 who are comfortable in their own skin.

They don't crumble when people criticise them unjustly. They are comfortable saying 'I'm sorry' when they are wrong. And they are confident of their own talents. They can laugh at themselves.

The wonderful thing about high self-esteem is that it gives us

more success at work
we seem more attractive to our partners
we don't need others' approval
life seems more bright and joyful and less gloomy
we feel great about ourselves

However, I don't think it's our fault entirely if we have low self-esteem.

That's because the way our parents brought us up, had a HUGE impact on our confidence levels.

Were you expected to be 'perfect' when you were young?
Were you harshly criticised if you had a big dream or wanted something badly?
Were you constantly compared to other kids?
Have you 'failed' at achieving something (eg: losing a game, scoring a D in an exam) and made to feel as though you were a complete failure as a person?

The above are some examples of how our parents might have unknowingly stumped our self-esteem.

7 Ways to Re-build Our Self-Esteem

01

Accomplish more
I'm not referring to accomplishing something as big as winning an award or getting a medal at some sports event.

We can set small goals, pursue the small goals and achieve them. Once we've achieved our goals - be it small or big goals - we will have esteem-like feelings.

Make sure that the goals you set bring satisfaction to yourself. Don't set goals to please another person or to get praise!

Do you know what's interesting?

Bragging a little bit of our accomplishments on Facebook or Instagram can also boost our self-esteem. Just don't overdo it or we will be a tad annoying 😉

02

Be Aware of Your Talents
This might seem obvious to some of us.

But low self-esteem people are not aware or choose to ignore their strengths.

If you put pen to paper and list your strengths and talents, you might be surprised that your list is longer than you thought.

Or, you can get a trusted person to list your strengths. You will get insight into your talents you were not aware of!

03

Treat yourself like a worthwhile person
This is where self-care comes in.

Pamper yourself with a massage, a warm bath, diffuse some essential oils (geranium essential oil evokes feelings of self-love if you are into the metaphysical), play with a pet or child, journal, exercise, dine at your favourite place... basically do activities which make you feel awesome.

These feel-good activities will send signals to your mind that you are a valuable person worthy of nice things in life.

04

Fake it till you make it
Is there a celebrity whom you admire because she is so confident of herself during interviews?

Or someone you know personally?

We can model their body language. Confident people tend to shake hands firmly, make eye contact, speak clearly and stand tall. When we adopt their body language, people will treat us with respect which in turn, makes us feel confident.

I personally admire Queen Rania of Jordan. She gently draws boundaries when meeting people in public places whilst maintaining a smile on her face and very polite body language even when unknown women rush to smother her with hugs at events.

Jennifer Lopez is another celebrity who is a master in people skills. She can answer awkward interview questions with jokes, she laughs at herself and effortlessly makes herself seem humble and approachable. It's a well-honed skill.

05

Talk & spend time with high self-esteem people
I adore spending time with people who are positive.

They help me to reframe any problem I have as something that will pass.

High self-esteem people will make us feel energised and recharged after spending time with them.

They are open to admit any mistakes or 'failures' they've had and they will still be supportive of us when we make mistakes ourselves.

In short, they accept you for who you are, flaws and all.

Value these people tightly.

06

Be Kind to Yourself
I like a quote I came across recently: "You can't get life wrong because there's no such thing as getting life right."

Everybody makes mistakes. Successful people make even more mistakes than the average person.

When we 'fail' at something, focus on tweaking our strategies. 'Failures' are feedback that our strategies need tweaking.

'Failures' have nothing to do with us as a person. So don't beat ourselves up when we falter.

07

Tame the inner critic
All of us have inner critics. These pesky little things will negate our capabilities.

Inner critic example: "My superior praised my work today. I think he was just being polite. Or maybe he is in a good mood. I'm sure my work wasn't that fantastic."

We can reframe it with: "I feel good that my superior praised my work today. It may not be perfect, but I did the best I could. I feel proud for pushing myself."

I've heard of a successful businessman who has an unorthodox approach to this. He visualises his inner critic as an iguana (of all things!). He said that all of us have these 'iguanas' living in our minds.

When negative self-talk starts in his mind, he will shrug it off as the 'iguana' blabbering (yet again).

This is one creative way we can separate our destructive self-talk from ourselves.

Please remember that changes in habit or mindset takes time. 🙂

We will not be a confident superstar immediately after applying all the 7 tips above. If we've been having low self-esteem for years, we can't just switch to being a confident person in 1 day.

Be kind to yourself and give yourself time to change.

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How To Reprogram Your Mind (for Positive Thinking)

Stress Is Another Word For Fear

In spite of living in the modern day world where most of us live in a secure environment and relative free of life threatening issues, many people experience more fear than in times past where many faced danger and even death on a daily basis.

Fear is an unpleasant feeling of perceived risk or danger, real or not.

Fear also could be described as a feeling of extreme dislike to some conditions or objects, such as: fear of darkness, fear of ghosts, etc.

It is one of the basic emotions.

Fear inside a person has degrees and it's different from one person to another and if it's not properly handled could lead to social and health problems. Fear can be described by different terms in accordance with its relative degrees - terror, fright, paranoia, horror, or even a persecution complex.

Many times, controlling people use fear as a powerful weapon, manipulating people into doing certain actions for the perpetrators personal gain.

Anxiety, stress, fear, phobia and tension are often used interchangeable to describe one of this century's most common problems.

Anxiety has been called the official emotion of our age, the bases of all neuroses, and the most pervasive psychological phenomenon of our time.

Intense anxiety can shorten one's attention span, make concentration difficult, cause forgetfulness, hinder performance skills, interfere with problem solving, block effective communication, arouse panic, and sometimes cause unpleasant physical symptoms such as paralysis, rapid heartbeat or intense headaches.

In all of it's many forms, fear can be a serious detriment to health and in many cases it can be totally avoided.

After all is said and done, fear is only a factor in our lives when we discover it's true identity, stress.

As we lead our daily lives each of us have many things we can stress out about, the list is endless. Only when we realize it is created in our mind can we deal with it and eliminate fear from our lives.

FEAR is just an acronym for False Evidence Appearing Real. Most of what we fear never materializes, it is just our mind playing tricks on us, and if we stop and think most of the time we can create an environment where our fears never materialize.

It is this thinking that creates undue stress, and this stress is created by a lack of faith. We either have faith or fear in our lives, we can't have both.

Fear is running rampant in America today because many have lost faith, faith in themselves, faith in a higher power and the faith to know that in the end, everyt

I have traversed the globe in search of truth, my truth, during which time I have had an opportunity to study with Aborigine elders, native American Indians, and some of the world's finest intuitives. All of this has lead me to better understand our world and all things therein contained.

I have created a blog: [http://www.thefloridahoosier.com]. And a website to share some9 of my adventures and knowledge as I see it.

[http://www.journeysthrulife.com]

I have written several books and am available for book signings and speaking engagements.

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Are Your Sales Results Not Living Up To Your Expectations? There Are Five Basic Reasons

There are many reasons why sales effort, a lot of time, allocation of many resources, planning and so much more can still lead to slow and even poor sales results. Having been observing and teaching sales strategies and practices around the world for over thirty-five years and witnessing numerous stupid as well as genius tactics used by individuals and organizations I believe there are five basic reasons why sales decline or are in a slump regardless of the economy, industry, consumer desires, and competitive philosophies, etc.

Many sales trainers and sales experts might suggest that it's just poor execution of Sales 101 - prospecting skills, poor presentation skills or the inability to effectively disarm objections and close sales. Although all of these traditional sales methodologies are important, I believe that even if you have all of these and lack the following five you will never achieve sustained increased sales results and income. I'll keep this simple.

Here are the five reasons -

-A lack of consistent execution of a proven process.
-Reliance on a single marketing approach.
-Poor product/service messaging.
-Over or underuse of specific communication techniques.
-A lack of execution integrity.

-A lack of consistent execution of a proven process.

To achieve sustained and lasting success a process is required. It doesn't matter if it's cooking in the kitchen, operating in the hospital or building on a construction site. Wherever you see success I will guarantee there is a process that is consistently being followed to ensure positive results.

The sales process is no different. If one minute you are selling this way and the next minute you are selling differently - I will guarantee you will get inconsistent results. Let me give you a quick example.

Let's say you have a prospect who needs and wants your product or service and you have been trained to sell it a certain way. But you have decided because this person seems more available or affinitive to you - you decide to adjust your approach and get a bit more friendly than normal, open or whatever - as a result, you create a different sales environment that deviates from your standard approach - one you are unfamiliar with and one the prospect may feel is a bit forward. You have abandoned your process. Now, don't get me wrong, I'm not saying you shouldn't tailor your sales message to the style or interests of each prospect, what I'm saying is if and when you abandoned proven sales techniques, strategies, and approaches for something new or different you will get less than historical proven positive outcomes.
I'm not implying that any or all processes are successful or the best approach or that any process should not be open to change, improvement and updating. And, I don't want my heart surgeon sticking with the process when it's his or her instincts to adjust or adapt but I do want them to stick with protocols when situations or circumstances warrant it.

If you don't have and stick with a proven sales process, I will guarantee you live with a great deal of frustration, uncertainty, unknowns, disappointment and even regret from time to time.

-Reliance on a single marketing approach.

Yes, you need a website if you want to succeed and compete. Yes, you need to do Public Relations from time to time. Yes, advertising can help your sales efforts. Yes, emails are necessary occasionally and yes, you also need to pick up the phone once in a while. Get it - You need a successful blending process when it comes to marketing and its support and endorsement of your sales efforts.

When sales efforts rely on a single marketing approach, they will achieve fewer positive responses. When sales activity is not foreshadowed with some market exposure or not supported by follow-up activity you are relying only on the efforts of the sales effort. To get better and more consistent positive results from any sales actions it is a wise move to have both pre and post-sales activity that reinforces the basic fundamental sales message and customer benefits. Think about it - if salesperson A shows up for an appointment to sell - whatever - and the prospect has never heard of his or her organization or product or service - they have got a lot of work to do. When salesperson B shows up for their appointment and the prospect viewed one billboard, heard one radio ad and read one ad on a website they were searching prior to the sales meeting - which of the two appointments do you think will tend to have a better chance of success?

-Poor product/service messaging.

Have you ever watched a product or service commercial and when it was finished you were shaking your head thinking - "what was that all about?" Well, I have - almost every day. I'm not sure how some of these stupid ads make it past management but someone needs to wake them up- they are stupid and don't do the product or service justice. No, I'm not going to site-specific examples as I'm sure you have seen, read or heard your share of them. I just want to point out that if your messaging is confusing, contradictory or can be perceived or interpreted as negative or derogatory in any way it will not contribute to your sales success in any way.

-Over or underuse of specific communication techniques.

Technology wants us to believe that the only way to sell to people today is with social media, emails or the latest Techno Whiz. Yes, these are important and can often be an integral part of lifestyle today but let me assure you "word of mouth" has not lost its impact on the buying public or process. When the average customer has a negative product or service experience, research tells us - they will, on average, tell 9 people. And, those 9 people on average will tell five people and this process just continues on and on - so let me ask you how many people over time do you think will get that negative message and how much money do you need to spend on promotion and advertising to counteract this negative exposure?

Just ask any organization that has lost customers, market share, and even gone belly-up due to negative press and I'm not talking about "fake news" and in hindsight, they will admit they failed to anticipate the negative consequences due to this negative experience.

If you think you are going to hit a home run every time with a campaign of a new product or service relying only on your investment in technology exposure - you are living in "fantasy Land". I can hear some of you now, "NO, Tim you are living in "Denial-Land" and just don't get it - how people are buying today." OK, you are not listening - I didn't say you didn't need to use these media sources to improve sales, I said you need to not rely ONLY on them.

-A lack of execution integrity.

Talk is cheap today. People seem to throw commitments, promises and so many other things at customers, clients, friends, and even family members that in some ways they hope will happen, but are never 100% sure they will. Ever left a message for a supplier who said they would get back to you in 24 hours and after a week, you still hadn't heard from them? Ever have someone tell you they will meet you for; lunch, a meeting, coffee at a certain time and twenty minutes later they finally showed up? Ever been promised a refund by a supplier who said it would only take 24 hours and after a few days you are still waiting? Enough examples - I could give you thousands. The common thread in all of them is a lack of integrity. There are far too many reasons and contributors to this issue in today's sales (and general relationship) environment so let me just cover one simple concept - does this lack of consistency, integrity or commitment in your opinion, contribute to; poor customer loyalty, poor customer relations, poor repeat business, poor references and/or referrals, poor word of mouth and just a poor reputation in general?

If you want to avoid any of these "poor" issues (outcomes, results, consequences) - it's simple - here are five things to consider (yes there are many more) - 1) start meaning what you say and saying what you mean. 2)Stop making excuses - just do it. 3)If you can't do it or are not sure whether it will happen - don't promise it. 4)If circumstances that are beyond your control cause a promise or commitment to not be delivered - fix it quickly. And 5) Learn from your communication mistakes. Stop repeating the same stupid behaviors that are doing nothing to improve your image and sales results whether as an individual or an organization!

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Do This One Thing To Control Your Mind - Dr. Joe Dispenza Leave You Speechless

How To Take Action And Live Without Regrets

What someone could find is that when they look back on their day or their week, there are a number of things that they wished they had done. They could spend hours wondering why they didn't do something and beat themselves up in the process.

The months are then going to go by and one is not only going to punish themselves for what they haven't done and to feel bad, they are also going to miss out on a lot of things. For their life to change, they will need to do something about what is going on.

An Important Question

One thing that they can do, to make themselves do something, is to ask themselves how they will feel that evening or the day after if they don't do something. So one will have the need to do something and, in this moment, they can focus on how they will probably feel if they let this moment pass them by.

During this time, one will be getting in touch with all the pain that they have experienced before when they haven't seized the moment and taken action. If they can really connect to this pain, they are unlikely to feel very good.
​
A Powerful Force

One is not facing this pain just because they want to feel bad; they are facing it so that they can see that as fearful/nervous as they might feel at this moment in time, they will feel a lot worse if they don't take action. How they feel right now will pass, but if they don't go for it, they will have a critical voice and a lot of emotional pain to sit with.

If they do connect with this pain, they may find that they are actually able to take action. The pain of having to face up to another thing that they regret not doing could just be too much for them to handle.

Another Element

What one can also think about during this time is that no matter how emotionally charged and real their experience is, it won't be long until what they are going through will just be another memory. Therefore, regardless of what takes place, it will most likely be something that will soon fade away.

To really understand this, they could think about the other moments in their life where they felt uncomfortable that are just memories now. At the time, these moments would have been all encompassing but now, they could just seem like experiences that hardly had an impact on them.

Final Thoughts

What this illustrates is how important the mind is when it comes to taking action. By asking the right questions and reflecting on how painful it will be not to do something, one can get themselves moving and make taking action a habit.

One could start on the things that make them feel uncomfortable but not too uncomfortable. Starting small can allow them to see that getting uncomfortable is not going to end their life and make it easier for them to face things that make them feel really uncomfortable.

Teacher, prolific writer, author, and consultant, Oliver JR Cooper, hails from England. His insightful commentary and analysis covers all aspects of human transformation, including love, partnership, self-love, and inner awareness. With over two thousand, three hundred in-depth articles highlighting human psychology and behaviour, Oliver offers hope along with his sound advice.

To find out more go to - http://www.oliverjrcooper.co.uk/

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